The bride tosses off the bouquet, slips out of that gown and into some fabulous Jackie Kennedy number with a pillbox hat and the happy couple hops into the convertible and sets off down the highway with all of us waving until the “Just Married” sign is a dot on the horizon and the sound of the tin cans fades away into the night. Ha ha ha. Not so fast tiger – here’s what you need to know so the honeymoon planning only causes half the arguments that the wedding did.
Thing No. 1: Go home.
After the wedding, go home or to a bridal suite somewhere locally, but do not plan to leave for your honeymoon. That’s crazy – there’s been too much chaos for months and you will have had a huge day – you need to go somewhere alone, drink some more champagne, gossip about who wore what to the wedding and who showed up with whom and then spend a leisure day packing, dropping off keys, stopping mail etc. before you start traveling.
Thing No. 2: Decide whether you want to be vertical or horizontal.
There are two kinds of trips – the kind where you move around a lot and the kind where you don’t. You both need to agree in advance which kind this is going to be. If he wants to helicopter ski and she wants to lay on the beach with umbrella drinks…these ideas are not compatible. Theoretically, you will take many trips together over your lifetime so figure out how you both want to spend this one in particular. Without a doubt make sure at least the first few days are horizontal. You will be exhausted.
Thing No. 3: Register for the honeymoon.
Lots of couples forego the toaster gifts (on account of they already have a toaster) and register for the honeymoon. You can register at places like www.giftpile.com or www.thebigday.com where you’ll select your destination and then create your list of activities each of which is associated to a corresponding cash value. The registry company collects the funds and once it’s time to go, they send you a check, with which, you then turn around and pay off your credit cards (kidding – sort of.) Point is, your guests love the idea of sponsoring a romantic dinner on the beach but the truth is, you’re just getting a bundle of cash and the honeymoon police are not going to arrest you if you decide to order a pizza instead. Some are affiliated with travel agencies and will book your travel and some aren’t. The way they charge for their services are all over the board – some charge a one-time setup fee ($295 for giftpile.com), some skim a percentage of the take from a sliding scale (depending on the cost of the trip) all the way up to 15-percent. You can avoid all these fees by publishing your honeymoon wishes on your wedding website – that way, guests can feel like they’re getting you something special but you do without the middleman.
Thing No. 4: Maiden names for this maiden voyage.
Ladies, don’t get carried away and start booking your travel under your new name. You won’t have time to change passports, visas etc and in this age of Homeland Security, it’s better if everything matches.
Thing No. 5: A shoulder to cry on.
Consider planning around the “shoulder” season. Of course, off-season is the cheapest but you really don’t want to be on the beach in the middle of a hurricane so, in-between seasons are the next best thing. You can find information about shoulder seasons around the world at www.contrariantraveler.com and www.travelandleisure.com
Thing No. 6: The suite scam.
Honeymoon packages and honeymoon suites can often contain a lot of padding. You end up paying hundreds of dollars extra for the Honeymoon Suite complete with a bottle of champagne and chocolate-dipped strawberries when in fact, you might have stayed in an identical (or near identical) suite and ordered from room service for less. Boutique hotels can also provide a nice hideaway with plenty of luxurious amenities without the pomp and circumstance of the big hotel/resort Honeymoon packages. On the other hand, if you’d really rather not sully your hands with money while you’re enjoying your post-nuptial bliss, a package will be all-inclusive. Look for favorite honeymoon trips, romantic vacations and celebrity honeymoons from Conde Nast Traveler at www.concierge.com.
Thing No. 7: Shout it from the rooftops.
People go gaga over a couple on their honeymoon and they’ll give you all kinds of free sh**. From fruit baskets in your room to champagne on the plane – even strangers will buy you dinner. Once you’ve negotiated the best room rate mention to the reservations manager that you will be on your honeymoon and ask whether you might be upgraded. At the very least, they might note it on your reservations and when you check in you may just get lucky.